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Thread: Post a joke

  1. #11
    Still Shakin' the Cage 08Rhino450SE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Crusty View Post
    Here's one that got me punched from the wife lol
    Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
    Because they're ugly and they stink
    yeah, but they stink so good lmao

  2. #12
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    A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what was going through your mind?"

    The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains out, and suck your tits dry."

    Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?"

    He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

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  4. #13
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    As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

    She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

    A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

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  6. #14
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    This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionallism goes right out the window...

    He tells her to take her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.

    "Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?

    "Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.

    He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."

    Finally, he tells her to take off her panties, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having sex with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"

    She replies, "Yes, getting herpies - thats why I am here!"

  7. #15
    in knee deep Snorider's Avatar
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    How do you turn a fox into an elephant?



    Marry it.
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    MTS

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  9. #16
    TOXIC TERYX Crusty's Avatar
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    Bahaha!!! Herpes!!! The gift that keeps on giving lol
    2015 Teryx 4 LE 800, EMP full glass windshield,JBS floor guards, Street legal kit. Highlifter 2" lift, Super ATV arched A-arms, M20 wheels, 28" ITP Bajacross tires. Bandit shocks, Throttle Maxx throttle pedal extension Rock lights, Terra45 winch, JBS Radiator guards, custom JBS hood decal and tunes!!

  10. #17
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    A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes of it, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!". The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!"

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  12. #18
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    Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.

    "Yeah teach?" he replies.

    "If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.

    Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."

    "No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.

    "Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"

    The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."

    Matt replies "No teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"

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  14. #19
    TOXIC TERYX Crusty's Avatar
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    A man and a woman were having drinks when they got into an argument about who enjoyed sex more. The man said, "Men obviously enjoy sex more than women. Why do you think we're so obsessed with getting laid?" "That doesn't prove anything," the woman countered. "Think about this: when your ear itches and you stick your little finger in it, wiggle it around, and then pull it out, which feels better—your ear or your finger?
    2015 Teryx 4 LE 800, EMP full glass windshield,JBS floor guards, Street legal kit. Highlifter 2" lift, Super ATV arched A-arms, M20 wheels, 28" ITP Bajacross tires. Bandit shocks, Throttle Maxx throttle pedal extension Rock lights, Terra45 winch, JBS Radiator guards, custom JBS hood decal and tunes!!

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  16. #20
    Ridin' and Guidin' Timmi's Avatar
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    rob is on a tear lol, crude but funny!

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